Long time no see??!

Its been a loooong time since I posted…The reasons for this delay are
1.Our BE(mech) trip to Rajasthan from 9th to 16th of march.
2.My computer was in the ICU…it used to restart whenever it wanted to…!Even today,after a lot of dawa-daru(more of dawa and less of daru),its not in the best of shape…
3.The college network is down(like tht reliance ad..always down,never up!)
4.Happy days are over,with only 4 weeks of college to go,profs are trying hard tht we dont feel sorry tht college life is over.

Well now I am back…I hope..

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The Diary of…?

“Sorry Sir,but the flight is full…”,the lady over the counter said.

“Comeeon ma’am!I have to get on that flight,all my friends are on that plane.Please ma’am you have to let me onboard.”I said.

I guess she was abit amused by an asian talking to her in an
British-Canadian accent.But she took pity on me and granted me a seat next to the toilet.These are probably the worst seats in the plane.You can actually hear the sound of the flush every time someone does the dew!

By the way,there was still sometime for the flight to take off.I engaged myself in looking at pretty girls boarding the plane.What else do you expect from an engineer(I did my mechanical engg from Univ. of Warwick,UK).

There was this really pretty airhostess who caught my eye.At the training centre where I was for the last 3 months,there were no girls.Even the cooks there were male!

Then a good looking (Punjabi,I guess) girl boarded the flight.She was dressed in a white salwar.Indian girls are extremely attractive,I thought.

She came to me and said,”I guess you are on my seat…”
I sure was.”I..I..am sorry”,I muttered as I tried to shift to the adjacent seat.

I have seen many testosterone driven guys who go crazy at the thought of a pretty girl occupying the adjacent seat.But mate,its not like she was dying to sit beside you.Its just that the Indian Airlines guys gave that seat to her!

I tried to strike a conversation with her.
“Hi! So you got the toilet seat too?You must have checked in really late?”,I said.
“Yeah!Actually my grandma took ill suddenly .So I have to meet her in New Delhi”
“Oh,so you are going to Delhi?”
“Obviously! Thats where the flight is going,right?!”,she said,giving me the ‘duh?’ look.
“Dont be so sure…”,I said.
She looked at me,half jokingly,half suspiciously.

I guess the height(33000 feet above sea level)was affecting the flow of blood to my brain.The last sentence that I said could have spoiled ‘The flight of the millenium‘.I was feeling giddy.I always feel giddy at heights.All this even after I got my CPL(Commercial Pilot’s License)just 4
months ago.
I got my CPL from Canada.The course requires 500 hrs of flying in 8 months.This was before I joined the Training Centre.

“Veg or Non-veg?”,the airhostess asked.(The same one who had caught my eye)

“Veg.”,I said.I guess I was too bored with the non-veg fare they served at the Training Centre.

“Are you alright?”,the girl who was seated beside me asked.I think her name was Trupti,because she had a pen on which the words TRUPTI were inscribed.

“Yeah,why?”I asked.

“You seem to be uncomfortable.Why are you looking at your watch all the time?”,she asked.

“You will know at 4:53!”,I said.

“What will happen at 4:53?”

“You will see!!”

Now it was her turn to be uncomfortable.

My casio sounded the alarm at 4:53.My Friends got up from their respective seats.Shahid(doctor) got up from 15B,Sunny Ahmed(Burger) from 5C,Mistri Ibrahim(Bhola) from 16C,Shakir(Shankar)from 12A and I got up from my seat at 28C.I removed the monkey cap from my pocket and put it on.I took out a knife from my sock and waved it in the air

“Stay calm! Everybody place your head between your knees…Your plane has been HIJACKED.Next stop-Kandhar!”

PS-
*The Training Centre that I was talking about is in Islamabad,Pakistan.
**I had acquired the CPL so that I could fly IC814 to Kandhar(just in case)….
**The names doctor,burger,Bhola,shankar were code words we used instead of names
***And yes, I forgot to add,my name is Ibrahim Akhtar(chief)

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Zombie,zombie,zombie….

This song is just going on and on in my head.
Do yourself a favour-buy the CD(if u havent already)
Another head hangs lowly,
Child is slowly taken.
And the violence caused such silence,
Who are we mistaken?

But you see, it’s not me, it’s not my family.
In your head, in your head they are fighting,
With their tanks and their bombs,
And their bombs and their guns.
In your head, in your head, they are crying…

In your head, in your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie,
Hey, hey, hey. What’s in your head,
In your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, oh, dou, dou, dou, dou, dou…

Another mother’s breakin’,
Heart is taking over.
When the vi’lence causes silence,
We must be mistaken.

It’s the same old theme since nineteen-sixteen.
In your head, in your head they’re still fighting,
With their tanks and their bombs,
And their bombs and their guns.
In your head, in your head, they are dying…

In your head, in your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie,
Hey, hey, hey. What’s in your head,
In your head,
Zombie, zombie, zombie?
Hey, hey, hey, hey, oh, oh, oh,
Oh, oh, oh, oh, hey, oh, ya, ya-a…
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Pulp Fiction…

Pulp Fiction

Warning…This is a post not many might like…But what the heck,its my blog and I can speak my mind

Ok..I do agree tht I am no art connoisseur and maybe I dont understand the complexity of film-making,or maybe I am used to conventional form of narration….maybe….But thts not gonna prevent me from blasting this movie PULP FICTION…The movie sucked…big time…

I am after tht Tarantino guy who directed(co-wrote…bloody idiot) tht bloody movie…. He wasted 2 hrs of my life…Had I been a law student I wud have had sued him for losses amounting to atleast 125 rupees(I could ask for more) for causing brain damage.I am also after travolta,samuel jackson,uma thurman,bruce willis(a perfect eg of naam bade aur darshan chote!)

The movie is a black comedy directed in a highly stylized manner and employing many pop culture touches, Pulp Fiction weaves through the intersecting storylines of Los Angeles gangsters, fringe characters, petty thieves, and a mysterious attache case.-Wikipedia

I guess Tarantino himself wrote this review,then he himself got PF nominated for academy awards,and then himself voted for the movie and won….What I dont like is the fact tht it doesnt make sense….the stories are disjointed,the actors are disoriented,the viewers are stupid…tht includes me too. But I watched it coz IMDB voted it as one of the better movies….also my friends and cousins created the much needed hype…I really regret watching the movie…

On a pleasent note…for all you guys who watched the movie and liked it maybe you should watch CRASH….you will really like it or even better watch this Indian movie(its in english) Flavours probably the best of the lot as far as narration goes…

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I just played my natural game!

Have you wondered how many times you must have heard this line from the man of the match…Well the man who invented this line is a genius! I guess you know who it is…arrey,its our own Tendlya!

I will tell you what happened…sachin used to win so many man-of-the-match awards tht he had nothin new to say! Also the mans got a really bad vocab..
Thts when “The line” came into existence!…If the presenter is boring you just say “I just played my natural game”,the presenter gets the hint!

But now its someone else who seems to be using this line like its his own jaagir! You guessed it right! Its apna doodh-loving delhi boy –Sehwag!

I will tell you what happened…When Sehwag was on a roll,winning MOM awards(man of the match,duh!)left,right and center and his angreezi being a bit kacchi,he turned to sachin for help with Ravi shashtri’s mundane questions!

Sehwag: Sirjee,aap itne acchi angrezzi kaise bol lette hain?? mujhe bhi sikhaiye na…
Sachin:Aiala!Its easy re! Ravi shastri bore karta rahegaa na,toh bol deneka..”I just played my natural game“..Woh chup baith jaayega!
Sehwag: But sirjee,yeh trick kaam karegi??!
Sachin: Abbe mein pechle 16 saal se yehi bol raha hoon!!

According to sources,sachin has helped Inzy with his english too!(Actually he has helped many boys in the Pak side)

The next time Sachin,sehwag or Inzy wins a MOM award watch out for this line!And watch how Shastri cuts the interview short!

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Holi cow! Holi is tomorrow and I havent yet shopped for any colours…Talking of colours,I think gujjus neednt buy any colours,coz they already are so colourful! You see,I got about 10 gujjus in my class,all of them colourful..But here I would like to mention only two of them…The first one would be Siddharth Ashara(bhai).You can read about himin my past posts(just search for -In love with sid ashara)

Well bhai,is one of the colourful guys you will ever to see! The spects keep changing according to the latest fashions.Right now it is thick and black,like amitabh’s in KanK(sexy sam remember?)…His Cell phone models change as frequently as Aamir changes his hairstyles! Has a wardrobe full of colours like red,blue,green,yellow!

However the most colourful,the one who takes the cake here and eats it too is Mr.Suril Shah! For starters he has a PURPLE(?) Pulsar with his name printed across it!!. He is a legend when it comes colourfulness…There are
stories about him having yellow shoes(personally I dont think it is true..).Shirts in all colours from pink to green!He has even tried a blonde streaks in his hair…The only other Indian guy I know who used blonde streaks in his hair is…er…umm…no one! Suril is the only guy who could
pull it off!Pretty normal for a guy whose favourite actress is Amisha Patel!
The whole point of this posts is that my friends are so colourful normally,I wonder how they look on Holi! I remember after last years holi,Sid’s face had different hues of red for about a month! What colours do they use there
in Charni Road(Sid’s home)-Asian Paints??

P.S-Gala would wanna feature on the list,but sorry mate,Suril is a tough contender!
Pushkar wouldnt even qualify…He is too sombre…
Jags,vishal,Abhal,Sahil better luck next time!

Another P.S.-The above post is to be taken sportingly…
Comments invited!!

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They did it again…! I am cocksure about the fact tht MSEB guys have cams installed inside my house.I am also getting the feeling tht they also read my blog,and in all probability dont like what I write about them.So they have decided to teach me a lesson by cutting off my area’s power for about 8 hours(yeah 8 hrs,thts not a printing mistake).All this
inspite of staying in mumbai(Mulund is officially within mumbai limits).We had some dreams of becoming Shangai,remember?…You got it all wrong Mr.Deshmukh..How about becoming Sangli? Tht looks positively possible! What say? They got cams installed for sure!SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
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