Showing posts with label mumbai. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mumbai. Show all posts

Enjoy the Best Dialogues of Engineering!

I got this mail yesterday....I m sure all you engineering guys must have read this one...
I am pasting it here for all my non-engineering friends...there are not many...I guess they were pissed off by my not spending time with them...Sorry guys! This post will confirm tht we are basically lazy and jobless people who coz of their own Time mismanagement have no time when it comes to spending time with their friends....

There has been a lot of fiddling around by me with the original mail...This has lead to the ruining of a perfectly sane email...



Enjoy the Best Dialogues of Engineering!




On being Late

"I overslept" (this is a Arshat Chaudhary special)
"Was caught up in the Traffic at SV Road"(Most Profs who have seen SV Road buy this excuse)
(classic) " Train was late" (Everybody who stays more than 10 kms from the college in Mumbai is allowed this excuse)



During Lecture

"Biscuit hai kya? Bhook lagi hai" (This is a SPCE mech special)
"Rahul ka assignment 3 tere paas hai??"
"Yeh double lecture hai kya?"
"Yeh kya sikha raha hai??!"

(classic)"Journal sheet hai??"


Lab
"Practicals hone wala hai?" (Again a SPCE special)
"Expt. 1 likha??"
"Attendance ho gaya??"

(classic)"Karna kya hai??"



Unit Test

"Yeh kab sikha ke kab hua??"
(classic)"Aaj kounsa test hai?"


late submission of assignments

"SOM ka last date extend hua thaa"
(classic)"I didnt know the last date"



VIVA (b4 exam)

"submission ab tak hua nahi hai , VIVA kya ghanta doonga"
"Dekh Boss !! external bhi aadmi hai. Usko pata hai students ka ab tak preparation nahi hua hai......(ekdum emotional )"



VIVA (after exam)
"yeh bhi syllabus mein thaa kya?"
"achha !!! ye aise hota hai kya?"
"ye subject ka reference book kaunsa hai"
"Vidyalankar mein to alag hai"





VIVA (general)
"Dekh , tu jo bhi padhega , woh (external) tereko woh nahi poochhnewaala , then watz the point"
"Roll no. 1 aur 2 ko wapas bulaaya hai"
"External is asking Bermuda Triangle ka Magnetic force kitna hai"
"Ye kounse subject mein aata hai"

(Classic) "Aaj kounsa Viva hai?"
When is Sardar Patel's bday? (This ques was actually asked in SPCE..Sardar Patel College of Engg.)




Submission
" Ye bhi chhapna hai kya??"
"Iska bhi print-out lena hai kya?"

(classic)"Tujhe Sir ka sign aata hai kya?"

(classic conversation)

A: Ye tune kya likha hai / teri handwriting aisi kyun hai?

B: Jo word samajh mein aa raha hai woh likh , jo nahi samajh mein aa raha hai uska drawing nikal

maine Mahesh se likha hai, mera assignment check ho gaya , tu bhi wohi kar.

Jo word samajh mein aa raha hai woh likh , jo nah samajh mein aa raha hai woh chhod de.


EXAM

"Jo (mujhe)aata hai , woh (paper mein)aata nahi hai; jo nahi aata hai woh aata hai"
"ye question 2 saal se nahi poochha hai"
"ye last time hi poochha thaa"
"tere paas Daji ke notes hai??"
" nahi samjha to rat le "

(classic..... when someone is intensively doing his last revision) "Yeh nahi aayega !!!"

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How to set a Mumbai university paper

Ever wondered how these profs set the question papers? well this is how-
Prof 1:There is no fun in our life!
Prof 2:(disinterested) ya!
Prof 1:Can we do something to make it interesting?
Prof 2:(disinterested)Nope
Prof 1:yes we can! What do you say we set a really difficult paper for sem 8 students? Isnt tht FUN?!! I know…we can set the complete paper out of syllabus
Prof 3 overhears the conversation
Prof 3: You know,setting questions out of the syllabus is not allowed in mumbai university
Prof 1:Who cares??
Prof 3:If you set such a paper you will be thrown out of the University
Prof 1: er..on second thought…maybe tht is not so much fun…I know…we can set questions which are least expected by the student fraternity…Or maybe we will twist the easy questions in such a way tht they become unsolveable…or/and we could have some critical data missing in the problem so tht students waste time racking their brains…are you with me Prof 2?
Prof 2:(disinterested)ya
Prof 1:are you with me Prof 3?
Prof 3:I dont think thts very smart…Prof 2? you approve of this plan?
Prof 2: (disinterested)whatever!

RAC was a not so good…Last 3 papers to go!

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1 letters to the editor