Showing posts with label lucky. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lucky. Show all posts

A letter to my just born son...

Hi baby, 


This is the first time I am calling a boy - baby. Seems kinda weird to be very honest. I wrote a letter to both your akkas - Pranaya (read here) & Aainee (read here) when they were born. And I knew I had to write one for you. 


I am writing this as your mom is getting ready to bring you in the world - this process, which I have been witness to 2 times already scares me, and makes me respect your amma even more - but scares me for the most part, like if she can take that amount of pain, she can kick my butt if shit ever went down. 


We have been ready for a long time for you, son. When I was growing up, pretty early I knew I wanted a son - someone to share the life with, someone to teach all the guy things one a man learns over time - things about women, wine, beer, bread, work, purpose of life, did I mention women? I think all men start out wanting sons, I always thought daughters would be a lot of work (this part is not true) & you have to constantly look out for them (this part is true) - but the part that I didnt realize is how beautiful my life would get with two daughters.


A friend once asked what is the test of the fact that you are in love - I said if you happen to think about someone more than 17 times a day, you are in love! (Tune in to my daily gyaan sessions on youtube). I think about Pranaya & Aainee a lot more times than that every day. One day you will fall in love with a woman and feel love cant get deeper than that, wait till you have daughters - that love is something different. 


I am lucky to have such amazing women in my life - I am using the word "women" for Pranaya and Aainee coz thats what they are - you should see how they talk! Pranaya is a lot like me, it's like living my childhood again through her - in that sense, she is lucky too - to have a parent who completely understands how she's wired and understand the things that pain her or bring her joy. Aainee, we are still trying to figure out where her source code comes from! She is nothing like any of us, not like the parents, or grandparents or her sister - she is the spice in our very low sodium lives. 


Your sisters are flowers. There are times when I am looking at them paint, or make something with clay and they look at me, my heart skips a beat - it's different from how one falls in love with a woman, but still same same. Do you understand? See? How this letter has become about them?


The other day someone asked me what does it take to be a good father? <Start of gyaan sesh> I said two things  - Indulgence & sacrifice. Indulgence is getting to understand them, involve them in your world, get involved in theirs, be less grown up and more growing up - with them. Sacrifice is the easy bit, it is automatic and doesnt even feel like a sacrifice at the time. <End of gyaan sesh>





It is 6 am on a slightly chilly Dubai morning. You came into the world crying and punching arms to the background of "Eye of the Tiger" (in my head). 


I am writing this after you have arrived in our lives -  all pink (& for some reason angry, like an Irishman). I can't tell you how happy I am, son, that you are here - one very important reason is of course, now the attention of your amma & akkas will get diverted to your misdoings and I will be free to do as I like (or at least that's how it is in my head). Also, I didnt want one more girl come into my family and tell me how I do things wrong - the women lobby in the house is strong as it is (this is also why I call your akkas "women").


I was the first Chaudhary son in my generation and you are the first in yours. Men like us have a great responsibility. For years the Chaudhary name has stood for sacrifice, hard work, leadership & an inexplicable charm - all Chaudharys have it - both your akkas (esp the smaller one) have it. I have it (obviously), how else do you think I got your amma to marry me? You, my son, have a responsibility towards that name.


I am writing this now because when you are 14, I will be 50 & you might think I am not as cool as I used to be. Then you will turn 21 & realize I am cool again & it is amazing how I have changed in 7 years. Jokes apart, I am writing to tell you that I might not be always right about everything. My understanding of the world is mine, it is coloured by my experiences of the world. I might, in my good natured naivety, feel that something you want to do is wrong - be kind to me & remember that your father is also bound to errors.


The men from my father's generation were the last who got to be men. The men in my generation have had it slightly tougher (because no wet towels allowed on the bed), for your generation it might be even more. Some men have it easier than others, some are born into wealth others have influential parents, things that are not in your control and their is no sense feeling jealous about it or worrying about it. Kids born in the most expensive of hospitals, in temperature controlled delivery rooms cry when they are born & so do the ones who are born in poor neighbourhood in the heat & dust. The lives we are given always seem more difficult than they are. If you think something is not right, go ahead and make it right.


Then there will be times in life when it will seem that you made a choice, a bet that didnt pay off. In times like these you might doubt yourself - To that I tell you, forget what the world is telling you - what magazines tell you or what the newspaper tells you - these are just words on a paper - they dont mean anything till you give them meaning. Forget what your friends are telling you, they have seen only as much of life as you, they dont know more, or better.  


My advice to you son, for times like this is - Do whatever feels right to do. And do not what doesnt. 


This advice applies, not to everyone but a few - it is applicable to those men only who are made right by the creator, coder, if you like - and you are the very best he created. I know it, and if you ever doubt it, read this letter again - I hope it gives you confidence and helps you become an even better man.


I wish you all the happiness & joy. I wish for you a courageous heart & hope that you find love in this world. Love, courage, happiness & hope in your heart, my child, will lead you a long way. 


Lovingly, 


Daddy


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Letter to my unborn child...

Dear child,

You will be here in a few days and I feel completely unprepared. I was, what I like to call "baby ready" right out of engineering college. I had begun liking kids and couldnt wait to have my own. I waited 8 years for you to come in my life. And now that you are almost here, I feel completely unprepared.

I have no idea if I would make a good father. I was lucky to have a really great set of parents. They let me take my own decisions, let me make mistakes occasionally, form my own opinions, in short, they let me be, well, me. What else are good parents supposed to do if not this? There is no set Key Result Areas for parents. There are no finishing schools, no second chances (per kid). My parents I think did a good job. And still, there were times when I was really mad at them. Maybe it is a sign of growing up or something. Maybe there comes a time when you realise that for the halo our society creates around one's parents, they are after all human and they are susceptible to mistakes too.

I guess, this is the reason why I am writing to you even before you are born. I hope that when you read this at 13, this letter will be still written by your 29 year old father. And maybe he might be more understanding than your 42 year old father who has salt and pepper hair and who your girlfriends think looks like George Clooney.

I am also writing to apologise in advance. I am going to push my dreams onto your shoulder. No matter how good a father I try to be, I might sneak in a few words about IIT and how you should try and get into engineering and how MIT has the best labs and you should work there etc. I am telling you now - I will love you no matter what college you go to or what you decide to be in life.

Interesting people, I have found, do only two things - They either create something or solve problems. The really interesting ones do both. If you are doing this, you are doing life right. Your looks wont matter, what car you drive or where you live wont matter. It doesnt matter what your friends say, or your relatives or even what I say. Being happy matters. Being happy is an art and like every art form, it get better with practice.

Your mother and I love you very much. We already love you, even before you are born. We loved you even before you were conceived. You know what? I was 14 when I first met your mother. And she was just 13. It must be funny imagining you parents to be little, no? I remember saying to myself that she had the prettiest brown eyes I had ever seen. I also remember thinking that she would make a good mother. Amazing no? That the 14 year old me would feel that a 13 year old girl will make a good mother? But tell you what, in all the years that I have known her, my belief in her has only strengthened.

I wish I could insulate you from all that is wrong in this world. But I wont be able to do that. Come to think of it, maybe that is not a father's job. A father's job is to guide, I think, not cajole. If you find this to be incorrect, please let me know. There are going to be times in your life when you wouldnt know what you are doing with your life and where is your life going. Everybody will tell you to do what you love. But no one will tell you how to find what you love. I am sorry I cant tell you that either. Only you can find love, in work and otherwise. One trick that I have found is to listen to your heart more than your mind. Your mind is plagued with what they show on TV and what they write in the papers. Listen to what your elders say, including myself. But dont buy everything we say. Most 30 year olds I know dont know what the hell are they talking about. Extrapolate that to all other age groups. But do listen to elders and ask them questions. This is the only way to gain experience without experience.

We are people pleasers, your mom and I. There are very few who dont like me and I dont think any person in their right frame of mind would dislike your mom. Being likeable is not the same as people pleasing. Refrain from picking up that habit from your parents.

Make mistakes. It's very important.It's okay to fail at things. It is not okay however to not give your best. Think about it, if everyone halfassed everything what would the world be like?

Those who say luck doesnt matter are lying. But over time, I have found, luck evens out. Once luck evens out, only hard work stands tall. There is no substitute to hard work. At the same time, not everyone, no matter how hard working succeeds at everything. Faraday, found out the relationship between Electricity, Magnetism and light. One has to have some divine intervention to find that, I feel. But when Faraday was made to work in a glass manufacturing lab by his jealous boss, he failed miserably for 4 years! You might not succeed at everything. But succeeding at everything is not the aim of life.

Some of your friends are going to have better parents, maybe more educated or who earn more than us or they have better toys or have a good looking boyfriend/girlfriend. You dont know their story. You havent walked in their shoes. Dont be jealous. If you learn to do that, teach me how.

In closing, all I want for you if good health and a good life. Happiness and joy. Experiences and lots of trials and errors. Lots of love and an honest heart, my child, will lead you a long way.

Lovingly,
Daddy.



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Dada's back

Kyunki FIGHTER hameshaa jeetta hai...
javed akhtar...(reynolds jetter ad)

Sovrav(or sourab..as mamta baneerji calls him..) is this blogs fav cricketer.
The man has been thru a lot of shit...was stripped off his captaincy not only in tests but also
in ODIs..was not given entry into the team...imagine the country's most successful captain,not given a place in the 11. Forget a place in the team,the least they cud hav done was to give him a decent farewell.
But no! they decided to humilate the guy! This blogger agrees tht there was a time when he wanted sourav to hang up his boots...(to save him frm the humilation)

Ganguly,howevr had diff plans...did well at the domestic level,got into the national test team...(with help of lots of luck...read end of More's term and india's poor run in SA)...


His meeting with tht sissy More was interesting...all Dada said was"U had to do your job...I had to do mine"
A sign of a man who has been annealed in the furnace of life...


Today he wears the BLUE jersey after 15 months...

Today the man will Open against WI...This is the position where he has made most of his runs...
Also he hinted tht we might jus win this one...
Dada might hav something up his sack...
make no mistake...DADA's BACK... Dada's backSocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
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