Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts


I take TV seriously. Yes. I do.
I take all art forms seriously. Yes. I called TV an art form.

I take sitcoms more seriously than I take other series. I think it takes immense creative energy to follow deadlines and come up with a fun episode every week.

I introduced myself to sitcoms when Zee cafe was still Zee English and Star World was, well, Star World.

Back in the day, the funniest thing that would happen to you would invariably be your professor telling you a nerd joke - some thing like -

Heisenberg is driving down a highway when hes stopped by and cop. "Do you know how fast you were driving back there, son?"
Heisenberg replies - "No sir, but I know where I am!"

Geddit? Geddit? Dont worry if you dont... Be proud of yourself. You are not a nerd. (Now seriously, search up the Heisenberg principle. It pretty cool actually.)

So whom do you turn to for a good time when you are surrounded by such profs? The good old Television. :)

So I was thinking, among all the sitcoms that I have watched in the last 10 years, which ones have been super cool? Which ones should you watch to be around as cool as me? Note that I said 'around' coz...well... let's not get ahead of ourselves here.

So anyway, without wasting any more time, heres the list -

11. MODERN FAMILY

Why did I put up a #11 in a top 10 list? Well, because I can! Okay... because Modern Family is good. But they havent come out with that many episodes to be allowed in this countdown.

Something tells me that I will be writing about this show in 2020 when I make my "Best Sitcoms in the 2011-2020" list.






10. Curb Your Enthusiasm

If the makers of Seinfeld come up with a sitcom, which is less of a sitcom and more of a mockumentary, you know its gonna be fun.

Larry David shines in this show.

I might be biased here. I must say this show does remind me of Seinfeld and maybe that's why I like it so much. so, in order to be less biased, I placed it at #10.

Yes, this Top 10 is awesome like that!



9. My Name is Earl:

Even thinking about this show makes me smile. It was so damn ridiculous, it was funny.

The show follows the life of Earl - this guy with a moustache and a dumb ass brother.

So, Earl has done wrong things to too many people. And he believes its bad karma why he cant live a happy life. So, he writes down everything he did wrong with his friends, relatives, random people at the mall and then proceeds to find them and make it right. What follows is supreme stupidity which like always, makes for good sitcom watching experience!


8. Sarabhai vs. Sarabhai

So, now my readers from Turkey, Jordan and South Africa (what? I get a lot of traffic from these countries... I have no idea why!) are now wondering, what sitcom is this!!

Well, its an Indian sitcom and its in Hindi (without subtitles). The reason why I am resorting to such patrioticity is coz of the numerous shows on Indian television, no show - I repeat - no show comes even close to this!

The writing is smart, the editing crisp and the acting top notch! It has to be super awesome for it to be placed above two very good American sitcoms. And it very well deserves to be seen and respected for its awesomeness!

7.Just Shoot Me

Scene : Six people sitting at a table, out of which two are deeply lost in each others eyes.
Jack: I cant have this meeting if 33% of us are lost in each others' eyes!

Nina (with a dumb expression on her face) : What are you talking about Jack, there are only 6 people here!

The 2 love birds get up and start walking, still lost in each other.

Nina (with a confident smile): Jack, I think now only 4% of us are interested in this meeting!


Super funny. You should have been there!

6.scrubs

Scrubs is one of the few sitcoms I have written about. You can find my blogpost about Scrubs which I wrote back in 2007 here - http://thetimepassofindia.blogspot.com/2007/06/scrubs.html

Enough said!






5. F.R.I.E.N.D.S


I have to have a heart of stone not to include Friends in my top 10 list of Sitcoms. 25 years from now, our kids will watch this and still be floored by how awesome it was.

Friends is a classic. It is awesome. I know a generation of kids who relate to the 6 characters on the show. So I have a friend who thinks he is so much like Ross, there is this girl who says shes a lot like Rachel. The point being, name one more show where you tried to relate yourself to a character. And remember the Friends quizzes you had in college? You didnt? Well, maybe your college wasnt as nerdy as mine then.

I dont want people to comment how it became slow and boring at the end. Well, it did not. There just wasnt much to do with the characters.

Would a remake of friends work? I think, it will. All they have to find is an endearing cast. Have I just given NBC an idea?

And If you are wondering, what character would I relate to, then there are no points for guessing - I am such a Chandler. I miss Chandler Bing's sarcasm.

Sigh... Good days those.

4. That 70s show:

Now we can spend many blogposts discussing if That 70s should be placed so high up. But the deal is, it is difficult to create such a show.

You have to set it in the 70s then make sure the slang is right, the aspirations, political views etc. are right. It sounds like I am taking this too seriously? Well, a wise man once said-- making people laugh is no funny business son. Okay it was me who said it.

Anywhoo, the point here, this show was awesome. Tell me you didnt love the theme song and the "Hello Wisconsin!"at the end of it or you dont wanna know what race Fes comes from! (Its Fes and not Fez - it stands for Foreign Exchange Student!)


3. Coupling

Okay. Now I think British comedies are seriously over rated. They are unimaginative and as boring as Indian sitcoms. Now I have nothing against British sense of humour. I think the English are hilarious. But as artists they are rather unimaginative, dont u think?

That is till you watch Big train, Little Britain or Coupling. Now the first two arent really sitcoms, they are like short skits put together. That is why they are not on this list.

Coupling is England's answer to Friends. Nobody asked England a question, but they answered nevertheless. Its genius writing and good acting thrown in with a lot of dry humour and a thick cockney accent! What you get it an extremely palatable British sitcom.

2. The Big Bang Theory:

There are two types of people in this world. One - who find BBT funny and two - who dont find BBT funny.

If you do a quick check on their report cards, the ones who dont find BBT funny, failed their science and maths exams on a regular basis.






1. How I met your Mother

The #1. Without doubt.

Once upon a time there was a kid posing as a genius doctor on a show. That show was Doogie Howser MD. And that kid was Neil Patrick Harris. Or whom you know as Barney "awesome" Stinson.

He single handedly makes the show worth watching. The fact that the other kids are doing a good job too just make it worth the 21 mins. When it ends, you want more. You wish it was 29 mins like the British shows instead of 21 mins.

Awesomeness is a word.
Lemon Law is a thing.
Legen.. wait for it... dary is what uncool kids say to sound cool.

All this because of NPH.

There are people who have an attention span of a bumblebee and are wondering where is the mother in How I met your mother? I know the title of the show is misleading. I mean seriously, where is the mother?

But should we care? Did we start watching it for the mother? The answer is no. I say let there be no mother. The kids can be adopted for all I care.

So let this show go on and give us more awesomeness.







Here. I am done writing this. If you just skimmed through this post then I say - Not cool mate.. not cool...


PS -Entourage and Californication werent included coz they r cool and everything, but lack the funny.

The simpsons has not been included coz its a animated series and in a different class.


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Short story: Someone up there had a plan...

This post goes out to all the men who read my blog. I realized that I dont write enough for the men out there... So here!


Short Story:

Present day...

My phone rang at 2 in the night. I dont know why, but tonight, I was sleeping the sweetest sleep I had all month.
She didnt even say hello... Somethings are so important that you skip hellos on phone -

"I wanted to say... say... yes..."

And I say, someone up there had a plan...

Chapter 1

I remember running behind that 10:15 infy bus. It's weird that people can be late for a 10:15 pick-up. And by people I mean myself and the pretty girl who came running after me. Well, running after the bus actually, but behind me. The phrase of importance here being -'behind me'.

So anyway, I stood there waiting for the Taxi. That is the only option you got to reach Infosys campus. I looked at the girl from the corner of my eye. She had a Infosys card hanging around her neck-the strap of which was kinda wet from her sweat. For everyone who says Bangalore doesnt sweat, I say, well.. You run-You sweat.

"Umm... Infosys?" I asked her. Yes, two words is what I could come up with.

"Yes?" she asked. That sounded like a question - Means use more than two words in your sentence.

"I meant, are you going to infosys?" I re-framed my question.

"Yes, I am. You too?"

"Yes. Wanna share a cab?" I said making the 'horizontal thumb- take a lift' sign. I dont know why I did that.

"Yes. Sure!" She said almost overjoyed. Now her joy might be because of reaching the office on time. But trust the male brain to chose the option that soothe's its ego.

I stopped a taxi. We were about to enter when Ajay came running to the bus stop. Whats the point in running if you are like 15 mins late for the 10:15!
"Hey! Stop stop.. please..."he shouted from a distance.

He ran at full speed and jumped into the back seat.
"Haan.. phew.. yes.. let's go now..." he said.

I kept looking at him with disgust and so many other emotions I cant describe. I looked at.. umm.. what was the pretty girl's name? I hadnt asked her for her name!

She looked at me and smiled. I sat next to the driver and she took the back seat next to Ajay.

"Hi... phew.. Hi.. my name is Ajay! What's yours?" Ajay extended his right hand.

This was even before the driver started the car! I mean seriously... Let the car start Ajay!

"Hi.. my name is Pooja," she said.

Ah.. so that was her name. A little too common a name... Bu then, a guy named Raj cant really say that now, can he. Of course, I wasnt named Raj, I have a still commoner name.... :P

"That's a good name... I like it.." said Ajay.
Who asked if he liked her name or not?

"Well, Pooja, I work in the development services section in Infy, what section you work in?" Ajay asked.

I looked at him in the rear view mirror. He was sweating like a pig. When Pooja sweats, she looks so cute... well, Ajay, he just looks he's having an allergic reaction to Paracetamol!

After blabbering for 20 mins, Ajay and Pooja reached the infy campus. I didnt reach coz what's the point.. I am invisible anyway. With my sorry walk I started walking into the office building.

"Hey, excuse me? I dont know your name yet..." Pooja asked me.

Really? She wanted to know my name.

"Ah... thats such a simple name.. really common no?" she said when I told her my name.

Well, it's not THAT common. I know only 5 other guys with the same name...

"Well, I ll add you on the messenger." she said.

"Yeah.. please do..." I said.

Please do? Please do? Where did that come from?

She pinged. We met for lunch. We hit it off.

Chapter 2

"Could you book me on the bus to Mysore?" I asked to the lady at the reception. We had an annual sports meet in the Mysore campus. I just wanted to go to get away from office. Besides, anyone who has been to the sports meet will tell you how awesome it is....

"Sorry sir, we are full..." she said.

"Oh... there must be some way I can go."

"I am sorry sir. There isnt any other way." she said.

My shoulders dropped like Venkatesh Prasad's after being hit for a six. I started walking out of the room, when she said -
"Sir? You could go with the cheering squad if you want...There is one seat left."

Chapter 3

I entered the bus full of giggly cheering-people-squad. Some of them even men. Nothing wrong with that. How can you be cheering squad if you are not a little giggly?

I found a seat - one seat - on a bus with 42 seats. And who is the girl next to whom the seat is empty? You guessed it right.

"I didnt know you were on the cheering squad..." Pooja said.

"Well, I am on the tennis team!" I pointed to my Tennis stuff like it was Exhibit A.

And she laughed.


Chapter 4

Mysore was the best week of my life. And I dont think that was coz I won all my games. It was something else. I didnt know if it's what people call love.

Today, I proposed! I have known her for 28 days and I asked her to spend all her life with me... Yes, just like that...

The plan...

If you are a 20 year old reading this and trying to find out an iota of rationality in what I did, I suggest that you dont...

I was 20 once. And very rational. But then, there are something just dont demand reason. The heart has its own reasons.

Place your hand on your heart and tell me there is no girl you know, doesnt matter if she's an actress, or was your girlfriend when you were 15, or your neighbour's daughter, with whom you would want to spend your life with. If there is, then you would understand. If there isnt, I hope you find a girl who is.

I probably knew I wanted her when she came running behind me. I knew she was the one when I was so scared to talk to her, just coz I didnt want to mess it up.

Do you believe in destiny? That things happen for a reason? That this life is a screenplay written just for you?

I didnt. And I am proud of the fact. There is a time for everything. If you believe in something without actually investigating or experiencing it, then its blind faith, isnt it?

But one day, I hope a girl comes around, whose laugh becomes an ambition, so much, that you wanna be the one who makes her laugh all her life.


Present day

My phone rang at 2 in the night. I dont know why, but tonight, I was sleeping the sweetest sleep I had all month.
She didnt even say hello... Somethings are so important that you skip hellos on phone -

"I wanted to say... say... yes..."

As I said, someone up there had a plan...


- Dedicated to my room-mate and dear friend Rahul and his wife... This is my interpretation of how they met...

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Yours is here: Dell Inspiron 1545

Its finally here! The day all of you have been waiting for. Okay, not you, but the day I was waiting for. After seven days (working days) of sleepless nights, my wildchild is here. The Dell Inspiron 1545. For guys who would like to buy something similar, here's the configuration and the price-



Processor: T6400(2.0 Ghz/ 800 Mhz/ 2Mb Cache)
Ram: 3 Gb
Hard disk: 250 Gb
Graphic card: 4500MHD Media accelator (32Mb)
Screen size: 15.6"
Bluetooth: Yes
Card Reader: Yes
Web cam: Yes
Wi-Fi: Yes
Colour: Red (Matt finish)
Price: Rs. 35,800 (Landing price) [Got a small discount]

Now that I have bored you enough, let me bore you a little more. Let me explain to you each and every term that I mentioned above.

Now, had I been yapping infront of a live audience, most of them would be asleep by now, but thats the real beauty of blogspot, I cant see you, so I can yap my way to glory. The last time I tried explaining stuff to my sister, she got so annoyed that she locked me up in the spare bathroom(we have a huge house). I was in there for 3 days. I lost 5 kgs and my biceps are now 26" down from the usual 28".
On second thoughts, I think, I shouldnt be taking the risk of explaining to you guys the basics of computers, simply coz, I have a lot of female readers(all 3 of them), and they might end up doing to me what my sister did so successfully.

But I wish to share with you this incident that happened a few years ago. We- me and my college friend C- (on the rare days we attended college) were sitting in the computer lab in college.
C noticed that the PC's 80 Gb ram was full. Obviously, the official data, data as in Visual basic, C, C++ programs, excel sheets, word files etc was only 214Kb. There were around 50Gb of movies, 10Gb of episodes of 'Police chases gone wrong' and the rest were, well, hidden in the system 32 folder! Why hidden? If you are an engineer, then you know!

So C wanted to save this "important file"- 'comedy scenes from Marathi movies' on the drive. Personally, I dont see the need to watch comedy. Our college and professors provided generous offering of comedy. The file was around 1 Gb. "Disk full" popped up on the screen.

C: Abbe? Kya faltugiri hai! 80Gb hard disk bhi full ho gaya!
Arshat (Me): Aisa kya store kiya hai bey hard disk pe?
Check kar... Phir delete kar
Tere ko yeh comedy scenes kyun store karne ka hai lab PC pe?
Arre nahi toh bahut bore hota hai lab mein..
Already stored hai na movies, woh dekh...
Sab english movies hai... Aur ek bhi comedy movie nahi hai...
Hmm.. (Going through the Pc) Kitna movies hai bey!
50Gb ka movies hai
10 Gb ka Police chases hai
50+10=60. Baki 20 Gb kya hai?
Arre programs, word files, excel files... kaam kiya hoga public ne..
Pagal hai kya? Itna kaam? Yeh dekh 214Kb kaam kiya hai sirf.
Toh baki 20Gb kya hai?
Ruk, files hidden hai..
Yeh kya hai. Saale System 32 ka files hai.
Itna Gb nahi hai System 32.
We played the first "hidden" file.
Shit.. shittt... bannnd kar saaleeee..
Arre ruk na.. ruk na..
Abbe koi aayega toh..?
Arre computer lab hai! Kaun aata hai yahan pe?
Saaleeee... band kar...
Abbe apaan ne thodi load kiya hai yeh sab files... Chal tere liye window chota karke dekta hoon..
The door opened.
Banndd kar saaalleeee...
Saying that I turned the switch of the spike guard off.
The door opened. We feared the worst. What if someone had heard the sound of the hidden movie. The probability of that was low though, the lab was AC and a thick door quarantined the room.
A girl entered. Probably a senior. Maybe from computers. I take this guess coz they had many pretty girls in IT and computers.
Thampi Sir?
Umm.. no, he's not here.
What are you guys doing?
We are working.
But the computer is turned off.
We were going to turn it on.
She gave us a look of suspicion and left.
Chal fir se On karte hain
Shot mat de saale.
Projector connect karte hai kya?
Saaaleeee...

Ah.. lovely days those were. Wonder if they will ever come back. Sometimes I wonder if we should have connected the projector. What would be the maximum penalty if we were caught? Was it worth the risk? How would it be to watch it on a projector? I guess I will never find out.

Anyway, this post got really senti for all the wrong reasons, I meant to write this post to update you on my laptop status(Not tht you care or anything). I have shared so many things with you, thought should share this too!

I make it sound like I am getting married!

Update: Inspite of the gentleman that I am, I forgot to thank all my friends who helped me zero in on this laptop - Hiren aka Lamda, Rishikesh Bhise, Chaitanya Aathyle, Ameya Sohoni, Nupur.. Thank you guys. You rock :) Yours is here: Dell Inspiron 1545SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
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23 letters to the editor  

The problem with having friends who work for software companies is that very few of them are actually placed in Mumbai.. I have close friends - one of whom is placed in pune, and this girl whos currently residing in Delhi.. Lets call them Harry and sweety, not to conceal their identity or anything, but just for fun..

So they arent jobless free souls like me.. they are pretty much 9 to 5 guys.. when my sunday evenings are spent playing cricket in the field, it comes as a surprise to me that these guys chat their hearts out on the net.. In other words they do the pretty same things on a Sunday evening what they do the rest of the days. To be honest thats what I do too during weekdays, but atleast there they are getting paid for it..

So this particular Sunday, I was winning the game for my team singlehandedly(some guys think I am Sehwag, with a really bad wig.. whtever!)


So after hitting around a dozen and a half boundaries, I checked my cell for any congratulatory messages..

There were two, but they werent congratulatory..They were what is see as FRANTIC
One was by Harry - Abbe kahan hai? You are needed here..
Second was by sweety - Kahan ho aap? Online aao na.. (Note that she uses the Delhi lingo- aap and all. If in Mumbai you call someone aap, they start laughing at your faces)

I wondered what important work these guys got with me.. I hurriedly completed my triple century (what? the boundaries were short!) and rushed into my abode.. logged in.. I sent a conference request to them.

Sweety has joined Harry has joined
Arshat(thts me btw):
here..

Sweety:
finally

Harry: all 3 here..
Arshat:
oye? kya hua? something serious?
Harry:
abbe nahi.. timepass..

Arshat:
wht the? Man.. I thought u were getting married..
Harry: who me?
Sweety:
main?

Arshat:
yeah.. both of you..
Harry: hehehe.. or worse, to each other!
Arshat: I think you guys will make a lovely pair! ;)
Sweety:
his mom wud kill me..

Arshat: harry? ur mom does that to women you marry?
Harry:
oh not now.. she has improved by miles..

Arshat:
see sweety? she doesnt kill them now.. I think you shud give this a try..
Sweety:
nahi re.. she has plans for her future daughter-in-law.. n i dnt fit in thm..

Arshat:
why? his mom feels you arent sexy enough? as in for him.. (Raunchy is my usp)
Harry:
lol..

Sweety:
God! you guys!

Harry:
hahahaha.. seriously funny.. I just imagined my mom say tht!- "sweety isnt sexy enuf fr u!"
hehehe..
Sweety:
I thout u were scared of your mother...

Harry:
And what gave u tht idea?
Sweety: Parent teacher meetings..
Harry: oh that! That was 10 years ago.. Baccha abhi bada ho gaya hai..
Arshat:
And he aint talkin metaphorically..
Harry: Infact I had a forced convo with my parents a few yrs ago, thy said i cud marry whomever i like..
Arshat:
Good.. but harry, tht sumhow has nevr been our problem.. the one whom we like never likes us back!- thts the problem..
Sweety:
hehehhe.. kuch bhi..

Arshat:
aur bolo.. hows life?
Sweety: Harry is having fun.. n will start working on a new project..
Harry:
And sweetys college is on as usual..

Arshat:
You guys knw so much bout each other.. and u say u dont wanna get married :P
Harry:
Btw, hows sally?

(Sally btw, is the 4th pillar of this..er.. table? She stays in Mumbai. Harry, sally, sweety and me are frds frm school..)

Arshat:
Shes good..
Sweety:
Phd huh?

Arshat: Yeah.. good college too..
Harry:
Sahi re..

Arshat:
But I aint calling her a doctor before she gives me a treat..
Harry:
I am lousy friend aint I?
(Trust him to come up with the silliest question, with no reference whatsoever)
Arshat:
You bet.. the worst I got.. (Trust me to come up with the silliest answer)
Sweety:
chup re arshat.. nahi u r a good frd harry.. y do u say dat?

Arshat:
yeah..whts got into u?
Harry:
No.. I mean, i dont call, scrap or mail you guys..

Arshat:
Oh.. cant comment on that.. I m a bigger defaulter there ..
Harry:
Nahi re, I have so many calls free.. and messages free..

Arshat:
u do?
Harry:
even STD is free..

Arshat:
stop bragging popat, this aint helping your status as a lousy frd :P
Harry: I dont know whats going on in sallys life.. Its been ages since I called her..
Arshat: hmm.. but your credibility isnt dependent on callin her alone.. as in, u always ask bout her when u call me, and she always asks bout u when she calls me..
Sweety: yeah, frdshp is nt all bout callin scrappin and emailing, its bout comfort..
Arshat: hmm.. we hav stuck ard for the last 10 yrs right?..and I dont think we have done tht bad.., I just want you guys to know, phone calls or no phone calls, mails or no mails, we will remain friends forever... I soooo miss u guys.. Do I sound like a girl..?
Harry: yes u do..
Sweety: yeah..like tht girl..
Arshat: wht girl?
Harry: She knows bout her mate...
Arshat: u told her? kya yaar..!!#$%
Harry: she forced it outta me!
Arshat: yeah.. right..
Sweety: ya ya.. i m very forceful :P
Arshat: oh dear..
Sweety: toh bolo bolo.. give me all the details?
Harry: look at her go.. she wants all the gossip doesnt she!
Arshat: arre thr is nuthing to say...
Sweety: u like her..
Arshat: her who?
Sweety: her.. HER! u like her..
Arshat: this is so 7th gradeish...guys, i m going home..
Harry: hey even i need to go, office tomo..
Sweety: yeah me too, coll early morn..
Harry: hmm bye then..
Sweety: byeee...
Arshat: bye.. take care.. have fun..:)

The problem with good friends is that no matter how far we stay away from each other, we are
somehow very close.. sometimes too close for comfort mrgreen
But yeah, its fun, the only time it is not fun is when the joke's on me.. which is most of the times redface
But seriously, you guys have been great.. And I risk sounding like a girl here, but I soooo miss u guys..
Take care u guys, and remember - I am just a frantic message away
smile Of friends, Conference chat and sounding like a girl..SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
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Thackrey "Raj"

This is not a Political blog and neither does it aspire to be one.. I usually write bout things that affect my life or of those close to me in some way. If Politics turns you off, please dont read this post, but if you are remotely interested, go ahead!

"Akkra rupaye zaale", said the conductor while punching the ticket
"matlab..? hindi mein boliye na..kitne rupaye hue?", the man(most probably from up) asked while accepting the ticket..
"marathi yet nahi kay? mag ja na parat bihar la" (Dont know marathi? Then go back to Bihar)

I was travelling with a few of my office colleagues in a state transport bus..Everyone in the bus gave the man a dirty look, some even echoed the conductors sentiment in hindi so that it was clear to that him that he was not welcome in this part of the world! I looked at my colleagues, it seemed that they supported the conductor instead of feeling sorry for that guy...and thats what this post is all about..


I have these 2 friends who close to me, both of them are non-marathis(and NOT non-maharastrians, coz everyone whos born and brought up here is a maharashtrian). Lets call them Deejay and Sally.. Both of them did their schooling from a community school, needless to say they were protected and identified with the culture there.. When they shifted to a bigger college, they had their own problems getting used to the culture.. Deejay complained that he felt left out when even in a group everyone started talking in marathi. Sally was frustrated that even the office staff talked to everyone in marathi..(and looked down on the people who didnt know their language)

The irony here is that she is a supporter of the Thackrey 'Raj'.. influenced by his ideology of kicking the "outsiders" back to where they came from, in this case UP or Bihar..
"But they are taxi drivers, carpenters, construction workers! How can we ask them to leave?", I reason.
"So what, I am sure we have enough people here to do those jobs"- Sally retorts..

I say - why not ask the south Indians to leave too? And the Gujratis, the Marwaris, why should they stay?

I am sure we have enough educated youth here to do the high end jobs that South Indians are involved in.. We dont want Marwaris and Gujratis coz we have enough of our Marathi businessmen to take care of all the businesses.. We dont want Punjabis in here coz we have enough marathi people who can run hotels and auto maintainance garages... All of you, go back to your respective states!!

The chances are, if you belong to one of the said communities, you would wanna scratch my eyes out...

And only I know how amazingly stupid and increasingly unconvincing I sounded when I said the those things..

Just like these communities play an important part in the functioning of the city, so do guys from the northern states.. Just like you go to a Punjabi restaurant for the best Chole bathure, you go to a bihari carpenter to get the best deal for your sofa.

But that said, it should be noted that its not acceptable to come to the city and live under a pipeline. These kinda people(and not any specific community) put a lotta pressure on the already strained city. Its these freeloaders that should be kept out of the city.



Time to resurrect the images of my friends..

Why do they hate the UP-Biharis? Its not that they have to compete against them for jobs or anything! Nor do they have to interact with them on a day to day basis.. so what makes them mad?
Its the freeloaders!! Its the people who think its okay for 7 guys to live in a 10X10 feet shanty in Dharavi..But Dharavi or for that matter any slum town in Mumbai has a quite a mix.. There are Gujratis and Punjabis, Christians and Muslims, marathis and south indians.. So why are Deejay and Sally mad at the northerners only? - Well, thats coz Raj wants them to! We do what we are told to.. More so when we are frustrated and want change bad. I dont blame them.. Crowded trains, bad roads, encroached footpaths do that to people... seeing their tax money not being utilised properly, their money used to provide electricity and water to the slums.. it sucks! Its similar to the sentiment people in the US show towards people who live off social security..

Now to the big question- Why is Raj mad at the northerners only?!

Well, a quick scan through Shiv Sena's history shows that through different time frames they have been mad at different people.. First it were the Gujratis (because they controlled most businesses and not the "sons of the soil"), then in the 80s the South Indians (coz they got the best jobs and not the "sons of the soil" ) and now for the last two decades, its been northerners..

The reason why most people dont know bout the 70s and the 80s is coz the "tigers" back then were "cubs" whom the congress bred to keep the marathi vote from going to the communist CPI. But then the cubs grew to be tigers and joined the saffron bandwagon to beat congress at its own game. Once in power in the 90s, the sena guys have added "value" by renaming every 3rd street to Chatrapatti Shivaji Maharaj and city has been rechristened Mumbai(which I support, btw)

Raj, who must have been in his late teens back in the early 90s, saw how his uncle worked up his charm. And now, his time has come to do what the Thackreys do best - implement the "us against them" doctrine. Then it doesnt matter who "them" is.. Afterall, this is tried and tested formula that has worked for ages.. Hitler used the same tactics...In that case, "them" were the Jews(and the rest of the world in general). Imagine less than 4 crore men ready to die for their leader and for a unbelievable dream of ruling the world! ... Some brainwash that must have been!!!

This tactic is super successful in the short term since it works for all classes who are on this side, but it does not help much in the long run... it brings a section of the society closer, at the same time, letting other sections drift away...

PS 1:- Raj is a great orator. Hes pretty charismatic. He appeals to the masses as well as the educated classes. Who knows? He might make a great leader someday.. When he does, he will unite the state, but in the bargain, end up dividing the nation..

PS2:- Deejay is still getting a hang of the language, but is comfortable with the idea of speaking the language. Sally has worked hard on the language and now, speaks excellent marathi.. The clerks at her college are proud. Her work gets done faster at all govt. offices simply coz she tries speaking the their language... Is that surprising? Nope! Its just human nature... Thackrey "Raj"SocialTwist Tell-a-Friend
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6 letters to the editor